What is love??? this words makes life hell or heaven. There was a guy who is full of life and always on its own. One day he met with a girl they talk and start messaging. Reason they don’t know?? Sex??na na??Love???woh kya hota hai???Friends..ummm..she already have a lots of friend then why this guy for friendship???..Don’t know. After texting they decide to go for a date. Guy was bit confused about this and don’t know if the girl too. They meet in the mall they walk, sit and had food but strange no gossip. Now things getting changed they keep on texting, calling and chatting. Next weekend they decide for a night out. They roam around full night in the auto and without any indication boy kissed the girl. She didn’t resist they kissed and start making love…Ohh just kiss and warm hugs not sex. Girl told this guy that she is committed to someone else and soon she is goona married to that guy. She was deeply in love with that guy..but why she is indulging with this guy.. Both were confused and they didn’t think about what’s next. Days go on and on and they were getting closer and closer. One day both were having sex and her true love called up in the midnight. She was too good to handle his call and guess what she was having sex with the guy at the same time she was talking to her love. Gross!!!. Now she said to this guy that she is in love with him and don’t know what to do. Other side guy was fucked up this kind of stuff. He was still confused about this gal. One side she was saying that she is in love with him and other side she was fooling around with her old boyfriend. Well even guy was confused about this and their relation goes on and on. One thing was bad about this is the girl never respect the feelings of the guy. She use to go for coffee and when her boyfriend called her up she left that guy midway whenever she want. Maybe she took that guy for granted. One day his boyfriend came to meet her and he find that his so called 5 year old girl friend is having lots of male friends. As usual, he can’t get over it and he brake up with her. Now Girl’s love for the new guy whistles. She took over him and one day she said I will talk to my mom about our marriage and her parents will definitely say yes. Guy from the small town said its goona be hard because of caste and culture but he promised that he will do everything to be with her. Life was smooth both were in deep love and they started spending much and much time with each other. Guy did everything to make her life beautiful. He cooked for her gave her foot and head massage now and then and never complained.

Things are going good and then suddenly her parents called her and tell her that they found her prince charming. She talk to that guy and that guy refuses to marry her but she keep on talking. Now she did it again. One side she was sleeping with guy and other side she was chatting and calling her prince charming. The guy asked her about it and she said just general talk nothing to worry about it. The guy said please don’t do this and he told his parents about that girl and convince them. When he told the gal that his parents are ready she said you are not of my kind and my parents will not allow me to marry a small town boy. Guy told her that if she wish he can speak to her parents but she repeatedly said no they won’t. Things getting worst and lots of chaos. The guy told girl that this is not goona work so let’s end up this and move on but the convinced him that there is nothing between her and price charming. She called her guy to her room and in front of him she talk to her prince charming. Height of humiliation, she not even think a single time about it.

The guy knows everything but still do everything for the girl and other side she keep on doing whatever she like to. One day guy said he is going to engage with someone soon. Now this was the first time in this relationship that girl was on the knees and she told that guy please don’t get marry. We will stay together like this and she will not marry to anyone. Again..how can that guy believes her. But as usual her magic get over that guy and he stays for her. Again things are going well and this time guy didn’t care a damn about her gossip with prince charming. One day she said to her guy that her prince charming is coming to the city and she goona meet him. The guy said why to meet and the answer was we are just friends and it’s been long time we are talking to each other..So there is not harm to go for date with him. Again in goose and bumps. One day guy and girl was having sex and during sex guy asked that girl how many times you say I love you to the prince charming and she raised her hand said 5 times. Now this is what I called twist. Is that guys love is not enough for her?? Or what she want???. Then one day that guy without informing her left her alone and started his new life. He thinks about it and the things he did for her. It was hard for him to move on but how can he trust that girl now.

Why she want that guy to be with her when there is anyone else she thinks about all the time. Why she was using him??? well that guy is happy now and he find someone who really wanna be with him and who just love to be with him and spend time with him. About girl God knows may be another guy or another friend..

…
Some tips from Times of India to improve sex life and my explanation!!!

Bowl him over with a wild move:

Do something unexpected and wild when you both are at it. Something erotic that he will not be able to forget soon.

Again, a classic tip which is redundant. The fact is that agreeing to have sex with an Indian man is the wildest move you will probably make anyway. And as far as both not being able to forget soon? That is also guaranteed since you won’t forget how soon he finished and he won’t let anyone in his social circle forget that he actually got laid ( like proud guy..Lee lee maine aaj iski). There is perhaps one wild thing you can do though – when he’s making your MMS (likely without permission) feel free to show your face. It’s as rare as pimps and hookers removing the towel from their faces in front of the media after getting caught.

Don’t be scared to be naughty:

Don’t hold back when you’re with your guy. Yes, we know that you have this ‘good-girl’ image that you hold sacred. Men like to see this other side of you.

To explain the pitfalls of this advice, let me give you the life cycle of an attempted and actual relationship.

Attempted: Crush -> Obsession -> Proposal -> Rejection -> Hatt randi hai saali bhen ki lodi iske saath kaun jaayega.

Actual: Crush -> Reciprocation -> Togetherness -> Companionship -> Love -> Getting naughty -> Time -> Boredom -> Wanting to cheat -> Breaking up -> Hatt randi thi saali bhen ki lodi uske saath kaun rahega

As can be seen, whether you reject a guy, break up with the guy, have any sort of intimacy that turns sour, wear short skirts, drink and make merry in the state of Haryana and countless other examples – it is ALWAYS best that you stay true to your Indian values, sleep in a saree wearing a chastity belt that weighs the same as your naulakha haar and make babies while the man stays 3 feet away from you.

So for your sake and mine, avoid being naughty.

Give him an eyeful:

Leaving something on your body, for him to remove can be very arousing. When you are at it just make sure you are near a mirror so that you can see yourselves in action.

Like I said before, the only time you need a mirror around is if you need to identify your rapist. Beyond that, given how barely any Indian man shaves his lower back or exercises enough, I really don’t see how it can look hot. The last thing you want to think about while “doing the sex” (I can’t get enough of this term) is if your man’s b**bs are competing with yours.

And for the last time, you leaving something on for us to take off is just a waste of time. Here is the template that an Indian man works on while having sex. (Gathered after the extensive research conducted in my Differences between North and South Indian porn post)

Kiss -> B**b grab -> B**b as water in oasis -> Hallelujah

As you can see, there is no foreplay. The only *real* arousal that happens when you take something off is if it’s the ring.

Now I wish I could elaborate more on how ridiculous their advice is (Give your man variety of positions and speed – Really? How dare the woman know what she is doing? Does that mean she has had sex before? That kind of behaviour is so immoral I’d send her to a bar and then go inside and beat the shit out of her. How dare she want to sexually express herself? Damn that Madonna!) but instead I will leave it to one of the commentators on their pieces. I can’t do as a good a job, even if I try.

Desi gal:)

All these tips are useful to educated city ladies who read books on sex, see porn videos and discuss sex in kitty parties. I am from the village and will marry to village women..(arey gaon wallon ko kaun city gal dega), who has been told by her mother that sex is for procreation only. she allowed me to have sex only in the dark of the moonless night only and only my imagination will decide how her organs part looks like. Do you have any tips to change the mindset of this kind of ladies? There are many in our country. Koi samjao yaar…Kab tak Andheri raat main diya tere haath main.

Now GTM Teleshopping:

The sad girl who couldn’t get anywhere in life: Then we have a sad looking girl complaining about (paraphrasing here) “Mera rishtaa ek acche ladke se ho gaya, who bhi software engineer. Lekin 3 din baad rishtaa cancel ho gaya. Mera koi bhi kaam bante bante reh jaata tha”.

it’s no secret that you’re a behenji. I give you two options. 1) Plastic Surgery (Especially since you might have a lot off money lying around thanks to the affects of the Kuber Kunji or Dhan Lakshmi Yantra) or 2) Go back to school and get an education so that you can uplift your status from being a permanent receptionist or call centre agent !!!!oops yeh call center bhi na..Ahum ahum .

Have you heard of a bl**job? Ever? Try it. It’s used at the workplace the most because of the exact same reason – it works.

I was incredibly curious as to how the process works and being the studio all day and being able to observe was a great learning experience – but holy fuck what is wrong with stylists?! It’s like they have a singular set perception of youth and what it means to be hep and stylish nowadays and anything to the contrary is just unacceptable. Now I don’t know about you, but I don’t think it is stylish to wear jeans that choke a mans testicles so much that his face turns pale and thus requires four more layers of foundation. Luckily I managed to save my testicles at the cost of dignity by finding a shiny spandex pair of stretch jeans which allowed my ballsack to breathe when I made a Sachin movement. And can someone tell me why the fuck do these ugly ass designer clothes that no one would wear in real life cost as much as a kidney on eBay? Who are these people who buy this shit? When did tramp wear become Haute Couture? Maybe I’m too middle class to understand this shit – but I don’t get how people spend 10 grand on a transparent white party shirt. Bhen cho 25 rupaye aur leke thoda kapda hi lagaa dete. And if you want to show your nipples to the world why spend 10 grand instead of going bare chested anyway?
At least learn something from UD.

Men who prefer the large figure—large mamme, bund and legs..were characterized by “ a need for achievement”.

Those who preferred the Standard figure..normal size of all parts .. were characterized by..a tendency to be disorganized in personal habitats”.

Those who preferred the small figure tend to preserve in their work. They are not clinical about authority and reported coming from upper-class background.

 Words from his father when he was dropped.

“Mera bachcha sher hai… lad ke wapas aayega” (My son is a tiger, he’ll fight back), said a confident Yograj Singh.

As his mother puts it “He was challenged and he fought back.” In the process, he not just changed the way people think of him but simply made them stand up and clap in awe.

After India vs Austrlia Match in Press Conference: For the first time in my life there have been claps in a press conference. I am sure this is a special moment for me, guys.” Yuvraj Singh made a telling opening statement. The whole media room was in splits. For the next 17 minutes Yuvraj played the role of entertainer effortlessly, his answers laced with wit and charm.

Awsome man…..

Something quite interesting….Believe it or not.

Thanks ravinder for sharing this!!!!

 Jammu and Kashmir is the only state in India which enjoys special autonomy Article 370 of the Constitution of India according to which, no law enacted by the Parliament of India, except for those in the field of defense, communication and foreign policy, will be extendable in Jammu and Kashmir unless it is ratified by the state legislature of Jammu and Kashmir

 The Government of India has been keen to economically integrate Jammu and Kashmir with the rest of India. The state is one of the largest recipients of grants from New Delhi, totaling $ 812 million per year. It also has a mere 4% incidence of poverty, one of the lowest in the country. Quota in Colleges all over, Quota in Seats..IAS, IPS,,,,,Now what the fuck they want? Baba ji ka Ghanta.?na na Pakisthani Zhanda ?ummmm may be another Porkisthan?

 No Indian flag at Lal Chownk??????? 63-year-long absence!!!!

 The ongoing march by a political party to raise the national flag in Sri Nagar is being dubbed as politically motivated by its detractors. It indeed is a move for political mobilization for ostensibly a matter of national pride. But in a democracy, is there any movement or any endeavour by any political party, which does not factor political gains and losses. Political parties nevertheless try to mobilize people within the known parameters of their respective ideologies.

 This is not the first time that national security issues are being politicized. It has happened even with respect of Kargil Diwas and Vijay Diwas. There is no political unanimity in tackling the Maoist problem.

 It clearly reflects the level of threat posed by the anti-India and pro-Pak constituency in Kashmir. It indicates that there are elements in the separatist leadership of Kashmir, who cannot breakaway from the shackles of the Pakistan military-intelligence establishment. The area of Lal Chawk has been traditionally symbolic of this threat for the last few years. It is for this reason that the concerned political party has embarked on this symbolic yatra. Leave alone any Indian, if a Kashmiri Muslim or a Kashmiri Pandit wants to hoist the flag at Lal Chawk, who is Yaseen Malik to stop them? If he does, he should be charged for sedition right?

In debate, a former Chief of Army Staff tried to describe the whole issue as politically motivated. The General must realize that the security discourse of this country is mainly dictated by politics. It is a reality and there is no escaping the fact. Contrary to what he said, the morale of the troops does get affected when Pakistani flags are hoisted and the Indian National Flag is trampled upon. Which sensitivities of Kashmiris are some people talking about? Is it nationalistic sensitivity or anti-national sensitivity? Is it Kashmiri sensitivity or sensitivity of J&K? Is it pro-unity sensitivity or anti-unity sensitivity? Is Kashmiri sensitivity restricted to the 18 percent area of J&K? bloody hell fed up with this word “sensitivity”..

 How much more time, money and lives it will take to address the sensitivity of anti-India constituency in Kashmir? If this constituency is in minority in Kashmir then why are the central government and the state government so apprehensive?

 The brave and matured men of the Indian Army have been witness to this insult for so many years. They have been sacrificing their lives for a solution to the problem. Left to the military, the problem would have been solved long time back, but the vicious politics of Kashmir and ensured that it did not happen. All governments in the Center have been hostage to Kashmiri politicians, some of whom draw their inspiration and sustenance from powers bent upon derailing the Indian story. Till then, the country is doomed to bleed with no end in sight and security will continue to be sacrificed at altar of politics. Sorry hai ji..can’t help it…

An angel came by and said: “Why spend so much time on that one?”

And the Lord answered:

“Have you seen all the specifications I have to meet to shape her ?”

“She must be washable, but not made of plastic, have more than 200 moving parts which all must be replaceable and she must function on all kinds of food, she must be able to embrace several kids at the same time, give a hug that can heal anything from a bruised knee to a broken heart and she must do all this with only two hands”.

The angel was impressed.

“Just two hands….impossible!”

And this is the standard model?!

“Too much work for one day….wait until tomorrow and then complete her”.

“I will not”, said the Lord. I am so close to complete this creation,

which will be the favourite of my heart “.

“She cures herself when sick and she can work 18 hours a day”.

The angel came nearer and touched the woman

“But you have made her so soft, Lord”

“She is soft”, said the Lord, “But I have also made her strong. You can’t imagine what she can endure and overcome.”

“Can she think?” the angel asked.

The Lord answered:

“Not only can she think, she can reason and negotiate.”

The angel touched the womans cheek….

“Lord, it seems this creation is leaking! You have put too many burdens on her.”

“She is not leaking….it’s a tear” the lord corrected the angel

“What’s it for?” asked the angel.

 And the Lord said:

This made a big impression on the angel; “Lord, you are genius.

You thought of everything. The woman is indeed marvellous!”

Indeed she is!

Woman has strengths that amazes man. She can handle trouble and carry heavy burdens.

She holds happiness, love and opinions.

She smiles when feeling like screaming.

She sings when she feels like crying, cries when she is happy and laughs when she is afraid.

She fights for what she belives in.

Stand up against injustice.

She doesn’t take “no” for an answer, when she can see a better solution. She gives herself so her family can thrive. She takes her friend to the doctor if she is afraid.

Her love is unconditional.

She cries when her kids are victorious. She is happy when her friends do well.

She is glad when she hears of a birth or a wedding.

Her heart is broken when a next of kin or friend dies.

But she finds the strength to get on with life.

She knows that a kiss and a hug can heal a broken heart.

  “Tears are her way of expressing grief, her doubts, her love, her loneliness, her suffering and her pride.”

There is only one thing wrong with her “She forgets what she is worth…..

It has been a rough year darling. The ethereal power of Craigs List will get this message to you I am sure, like in some sort of cheesy 80s movie.

Well back to the last year, you of course died at the beginning of it which put things to a sour start. I spent last night with your mum and dad, we went to that Italian place in Wicker Park, who on the surface seem to be coping. I had everyone get together for my 25th which went well, your ladies are on top form and I think some engagements are brewing. Ellen is turning up the heat on Steve who will soon be forced down to one knee as you predicted.

Last weekend I finally took the step of cleaning out your clothes from the closet, which is very barren now. I invited your friends over to take your what they liked, it was an awkward session. I think they took them more as a favor to me than anything else. Liz cried when we pulled out all of your shoes, Miranda joined in and then Catherine broke down. It was strange to stand in our bedroom surrounded by three crying girls. I made a joke about them crying for joy at the prospect of some free Manolo Balhniks which they didn’t seem to find very funny.

A few girls have put the moves on and as you know picking up women is not a forte of mine. It seems the grieving boyfriend seems to be a good angle. Who knew! I went on one date and spent it talking about you, the poor girl. You would have found it quite witty I think. No other dates to report, I am going against your orders to move on for now.

I found one of those hair tie things that somehow managed to squeeze into every crevice in the apartment. It was under the bed. I sat on the floor holding it and cried. Until then I had held everything together but it just all came flooding out.

Every morning when I wake up I forget for a fraction of a second that you are gone and I reach for you. All I ever find is the cold side of the bed. My eyes settle on the picture of us in Paris, on the bedside table, and I am overjoyed that even though the time was brief I loved you and you loved me.

Love,

I don’t know who wrote this but after reading this don’t know why I am feeling bad for that guy!!!!!!

Fedayeen..what they were taught in the training..” Aye aye lakshar aaye bharat teri maout hai”…As Indian I haven’t heard the word Bharat from anyone. Indians don’t feel safe, Bharat is not Manoj Kumar ( Mere desh ki dharti)…its ancient name of India..So please don’t laugh if u heard Osama’s message about striking Bharat..

If I were fedayeen, who would be in my list…

Manmohan Singh: Na na ..why Manmohan… I know people have been knocking you about being soft on terror just because you don’t hang Afzal Guru but I can feel your pressure man. Being Sikh how can you hang anyone who’s got a Guru in their name? We have ten and they sacrificed their lives for the country already so how can we make another one a martyr? I totally get it.
As we know SMS don’t have audio. Manu bhai moter chale pum pum pum…

Pratibha Patil: Na na..She is dare enough to took flight on Sukhoi Su-30. Whole world knows about the Indian Air force plane crashes. Poor women soon she will hit one building if she keeps on doing the same thing.

 
Hilarious Suresh Kalmadi: Noo noo..He is doing the same..Thank’s he didn’t welcome Obama..maybe he said welcome Osama for CWG with the song sung by AR Rehman : Aya aya Osama aaya.. Wakka Wakka he ooo…Poor guy still thinks Osama and Obama are same…

 
All ministers are safe..They are helping all anti Indian groups.. Doing nothing for this country.. But they are really a family man.. All relatives are settled and having awesome life.

Who would I choose to kill..I am trained to explode. Sounds like the tag line of Sony Explode music system…I think..Think and finally common man is my answer.. They are one who is really working hard for the progress of this nation. They are not cheating anyone..They are just doing their own job..own business..paying taxes which helps in the growth of my country’s economy. Easy target right… I can find them in the market during festive season, at stations, wine shops..Gosh U can find them struggling during the closing time.Ek addha, paua, half, Quarter..arey koi bhi de de bhai..arey baaki paise…I can kill thousand in one strike and it will be good for my terror group reputation and me.. All fedayeen will remember me as a hero..Massod bhai may be my name..ne shadahat hasil ki hai..Itni jor se fate ki sabki faad dii…Allah unko Jannat movie ki free ticket naseeb kare…

Bonus: Let me put the question in another way: If there was one murder you could commit in your life, who would you choose?

For this, is a special time when familyAnd friends get together,for fun. Wishing laughter and fun to cheer your days, In this festive season of diwali and always!!!!!!!!”Happy Deepavali”..To all…

 Bonus: Its dry day too..Dheka 5 nov ko bandh rahenge..Delhi waloon ne agar Quota nahin liya toh unko ya toh Gurgaon, Faridabaad ya phir Gajiabaad jana padega..